Feciliate, Motivate, Nurture

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Do not train a child to learn by force or harshness, but direct them to it by what amuses their minds, so that you may be better able to discover with accuracy the peculiar bent of genius of each”         – Plato

Read these words carefully and think. Are we doing justice to our children ? Are we handling them with care? Answer these questions honestly if you are a parent, teacher or anybody who deals with children.

Can we force a plant to grow? We can only provide the basic requirements and wait patiently. Why can’t we behave with children in the same way? Being a teacher, I meet parents at regular intervals. Many of them are not at all satisfied with their children’s performance. Very often I hear this type of statements, “Everybody in our family is well educated. What’s wrong with my child?” or “I teach her maths for 2 hours daily, still she is not performing well.”

After an experience of so many years in this field, I can firmly say that making the child sit for long hours doing the same subject doesn’t help at all. It creates boredom and the child starts hating that subject. Instead of forcing the child, create a learning atmosphere. Reading bedtime stories to them every day when they are very young, will encourage them to read.

Set your own example by following a proper routine. Fix “study time” for yourself and follow it strictly. You may read newspapers, magazines or books in your study time. See that study area is free from distraction causing elements like TV, phone etc. In this way, when your child will start going to school, she/he will not face much problem when asked to follow the same routine.

Whenever you make a purchase for daily needs, ask the child to calculate the expenses (according to his level). This will help him in mathematics. Parents with more than one child should not think that same teaching method with work for all of them. If the elder one can study comfortably in afternoon hours, the younger one may do the same in the evening hours. Let them have this choice and help them to learn in their own way. It’s a slow and continuous process. Don’t expect immediate results

Make your children sensitive not touchey

A sensitive person thinks deeply about himself as well as others. Such a person always feels empathy for others and is always ready to help those who are in need. But if you are a touchy person, you are oversensitive. Touchy people are not emotionally strong. What about our children? Are we making them emotionally strong or touchy? If we try to fulfil all their demands without making them understand that nobody gets everything in life; how will they face challenges of life.

Most of the parents don’t know the difference between sensitive and touchy, If your child is never happy with anything, throws tantrums to seek attention and always blames others for her/his problems, you need to be extra careful. But this doesn’t mean that all the time you need to scold them. This can worsen the situation. Follow the example a doctor who is a well-wisher of his patient. The doctors have to be sensitive as well as firm otherwise, they perform the surgery if required?

Parents and teachers need to converse with the children time to time regarding life skills so that they become so strong emotionally to accept their mistakes without feeling, bad and also they don’t get easily hurt by criticism. Here, acceptance doesn’t mean that our emotions should be suppressed. Suppressed emotions are dangerous. They need to be tackled in a proper way, by being aware of them. Feelings and views need to be shared with family members, friends and people who are very close. Listen to your children, converse with them but be firm while taking decisions. Tell them the reason why is it necessary to do so.

I’m sure by following these simple tips we’ll help our children to learn to be sensitive about others but firm about themselves.